In order to make any change, you first need to understand where you are now. It’s a bit like being on a road trip and being lost. You need to know where you are now before you can re-route yourself.
In order to understand where you are it is important that you are in a neutral frame of mind – you wouldn’t look at a road map whilst you were driving. Looking at where you are against where you want to be requires you to be in neutral, so that you can look at things objectively.
Once you are in neutral you can look at the situation or issue and seek to understand what is going on without blame and with compassion. You can then begin the process of understanding and exploring the possibilities with openness and honesty.
Samuel and Chiche talk about this in a little more detail in their book “The Power of Personal Accountability”.